“this may sound really nasty, but how would, say, people like you, wear this dress? It’s really too long for me..”
An amazingly, incredibly insensitive customer asked me.
“I don’t.” was my answer. Get it altered then you twerpy person? Are you dense? Was that a purposeful jab to make yourself feel extra superior or what? Now people, this was many weeks ago but I remember it like it’s yesterday. You know, people in general have this irritating habit of pointing out other people’s flaws. I don’t go around telling people their leg hair is too long I could plait them or, their noses are too flat I could use their faces as a plate if there were shortage of crockery or even that somebody has a really pot belly that she could join a circus act and start balancing spinning plates on bamboo sticks. I don’t, you know. So I don’t know why people do it to me. I don’t even notice these things about people until they keep on noticing me.
We had this really sexy customer once. She was tall, slender, very pretty faced and wearing a very feminine maxi tube dress. And some insensitive bastard was telling me “Asfa.. You should be like that.. Tall and sexy..”
This, coming from some protruding toothed, small eyed guy with speech problems??
Um. No offense, but dudezxx, I’m not asking for much, I don’t even need you to talk to me, but please look in the mirror? And anyway why even Bother putting someone in a certain mould of how they should or should not look like? Why bother? I’m not trying to be cliche but everybody has their own beauty.
I am also not very fond of people who like to brag about themselves. I find it turns me off alot and I soon lose respect of the person and no longer feel interested in being friends, especially if they keep going on and on about it. They would say I’m insecure but really it’s because I was brought up being told that it isn’t very nice to brag. Whatever it is you have, is God’s gift and you should be thankful and appreciative of it, not talk about it as if you had a choice or that you created it and owned it. At any given time if God chose to take it away from you, he could. Because it is not yours. (excuse me for being all preachy about it, I’m just disgusted by some things and some people so I really need to put my thoughts down)
Me: “I like jack’s* lips.. I think he has very nice lips.”
annoying bragger Jake*: “I have nice lips you know, see how shapely it is?”
I’m like, dude. The world doesn’t revolve around you. Im talking about Jack*, not you. why do you keep talking like you’re so perfect.
Let’s tilt the situation a bit. What if I were to talk about;
Me: “holy dripping sink, catwoman. Did you see how beautifully yellow Amanda’s* teeth were? And her nose hair! So lush!”
Annoying bragger: “I know right? Look at my teeth! It looks like cheese doesn’t it? Oh, and I made dreadlocks with my nose hair and donated it to the Society for the Receding Hairline two years ago.”
Really people. I don’t know what else to say. Some of you are just disgusting. I pray everyday I won’t be like that.
Oh, one more thing. I may be small, but I eat alot. I love eating. Infact, eating gives me such joy that nobody else in this world, except my cat Owinge, can provide. And I HATE (ok? This is a really strong feeling, so I’m emphasizing how strongly I feel about this, this is worse than bragging about yourself and insulting my physical appearance or both put together. INTENSE ok??) people who love to rain on my feasting parade.
“omg.. Asfa, don’t eat that! Later make you fat, more fat”
“Asfa.. You’re so fat already..” when I’m on my burger after my packed lunch. Yup. A packed lunch, and a burger. Told you I eat alot.
“fat, fat, fat..” *person saying it staring critically at me and my precious food.
Do you know how little flying fuck I give about your comments? I really couldn’t bother to give a popcorn chicken about what you think. See this???? This is me, still eating and not giving two shits about you.
if I were fat, right, that makes the rest of the world’s population made up of a bunch of killer whales. That’s not true. Even if it is, you’re probably one of the anchovies, swimming about peskily and about to be eaten by one of the passing whales swimming by, who wouldn’t even notice he swallowed you.
I don’t care what anybody thinks. So please don’t say things as if I care about you. Cos I don’t. So bring your worthless monopoly money (to replace your 2cents) somewhere else. Goodbye.
I’m gonna have 3 plates of rice with lots of fatty dishes and a side of burger and fries and maybe a milkshake by this week. Goodbye again.
P.s you put a bit of your soul in every of your creations.
Pp.s Strictly Pancakes was SO GOOD TODAY. ^^ and the movie HUGO, must watch! Storybook lovers, who like old English, Victorian-like steam powered era, watch this. It moved me very much. I found inspiration and meaning in this movie. Teared up a little (then again, I tear up about the littlest things nowadays.. Like kotex commercials.. HA kidding) so yeah. Lovely day. 🙂
Till next time.