why is everyone in a rush today? -.-

and maybe i shouldnt reach out. no. i shouldnt have. urghhh. but again, does it matter?? this is what im supposed to do. to reach out. why shy away? why be  scared? why even think what other people might think. just fuck them all.

and as my sister says – we all have our own lives to live. its not your mother’s life, your father’s life, brother, sister, aunty, uncle, grandma etc.
NOBODY ELSE IS INVOLVED or more important, than yourself. as selfish as that sounds. it is the plain truth. and in everything i’ve done. the things ive told myself. i realized i just dont love myself enough. i keep saying i do. or i think i did. but all the things i’ve been saying to myself, it just hit me. i don’t. how can i be so nasty? saying such mean, degrading things.. and not to people. not anybody else, but to one’s self.

so now.. my journey will include self discovery and self love? *oh.my.god. did i just sound like a therapist?*

im supposed to be doing my project (ohmaigawd. its been what.. almost closing 3 years i’ve heard about projects…WAAAU.)
i shall keep plodding on because i am a good girl in school (ahem. like i said, you wouldn’t recognize me…mouth close or not. still unrecognizable)
and i really need to sleep early because blahhdyyy hell puffiness is acting up and i keep feeling insecure nowadays. ): so that sucks bigtime. should do something about confidence level.

and tmr 6 friggin hours of practical… *puts toothpick to open eyes* hum. it’ll be fun though yes? i hope so. tadi cikgu ajar bukak gas je semua terperanjat-terperanjat sendiri. HAHA. i still havent gotten the hang of which colour board to use for which time. tsk. buckup Asfa………

arrrrghhhh!!! life skills… why is you a core moduleeee. whyyy whyyyyy!! *stabs self with penknife found on ST’s table*


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